Before we begin this discussion, it is important to get one really important question out of the way. How to pick up a stripper is a question that could have a couple of different meanings. So by asking this, are you wanting to know…
- How to take a stripper home for a night of no-strings-attached fun?
- Or, how to score a date with a stripper with the intent of possibly pursuing a relationship later on?
For the purposes of this article, we will settle for number 1. Since you may not know for sure whether you are interested in a relationship with this particular beautiful lady right now, let’s focus on getting her attention, winning her over, and scoring either a first-date, or possibly a spontaneous hook-up that could lead to more if it happens to go well.
So let’s start with the basics.
Everyone Is a Little Bit Different, So Take Personal Style Into Account
Every human has their own unique strengths and weaknesses. So obviously, you will want to play to your strengths when trying to attract women. If you’re a smart guy, play to that strength. If you’re a body-builder with an awesome body, play to that. If you’re creative and talented, play to that. If you dress well, make that a thing. If you’re a professional with a lot of money, that can also be an angle.
The idea here is to play to your strengths, but also to be genuine about who you are. You can obviously work to improve any of these categories (for example, buying nicer clothes or brushing up on some trendy conversational topics never hurt anyone), but this girl is going to spot you a mile away if you’re trying to fake it… especially if she’s been a stripper for a while.
Strippers are awesome at reading people, just FYI.
Don’t pretend to be a calculus major if you’re not. Don’t pretend to be rich if you’re not. Wear clothing that will flatter your body—not the body you wish you had. And above all, own it with confidence. Be comfortable with yourself, and you will be much more likely to put any woman at ease.
So with that being said, let’s talk a bit about the location.
Picking Up a Stripper in a Club VS Outside the Club
Going to a gentleman’s club with the intention of picking up a dancer is a bit different from picking up a dancer outside of the club. Here are the main advantages and disadvantages.
Advantages of Going to a Club
- It will be easy to meet strippers and start conversations
- The lighting is nice, making it easier to look your best
- If you go to the same club regularly, it can be easy to get to know the girls on a more personal level
- Going to the club is definitely the most efficient way to meet dancers, so if you want to date a dancer, that is an obvious first-choice
Disadvantages of a Club
- The girls are working… so unless you can catch their eye in a special way, you are just going to be another client to them
- It can be difficult to tell if a stripper is really into you at a club, because it is literally her job to flirt with you and make you feel wanted
- Some girls at clubs will say A LOT to get tips from you. It may not be fun to hear, but some girls will even lead guys on a little bit if it may mean getting better tips from them
- There are dozens, if not hundreds of other guys all vying for her attention as well
As you can see, there are both disadvantages and advantages to meeting girls at a club. So what you will want to do here is play to the advantages, while doing what you can to minimize the disadvantages. Here are some basic, square-one tips that may help.
How to Give Yourself the Biggest Edge When Trying to Pick Up Strippers at a Club
- Don’t be pushy! You are just a client until you catch her eye in a way that makes her think otherwise. But a lot of guys are pushy—so being laid back, chill, and confident, will make you stand out.
- Dress well, but be comfortable with yourself. Don’t overdress to the point where you feel awkward. Make sure to take a shower, wash your hair, shave and/or trim your beard, wear deodorant, put on a little bit of body spray, shine your shoes, etc. Your appearance should be pristine, because this is completely within your control!
- You are going to be far more likely to strike a romantic spark with a dancer if she has a more personal connection to you. This can happen in one night, but your odds get better once she gets to know you a bit more personally. So if you are interested in a particular girl, try to become more of a regular at the club. Don’t harass her—just hang out and get to know her! Also, don’t forget to tip her. This is her job, and she can’t afford to waste time on clients who don’t tip!
- A lot of guys at the club are looking for a quick hook-up, and will be really pushy to get it! It is very important that you don’t fall prey to this mentality. Be patient, be chill, be kind, and don’t act creepy! Also, avoid getting heavily intoxicated. The more grounded you are in reality, the more likely she will be to notice you.
Alright, now that we have talked about how to make the atmosphere of the club work to your advantage, let’s talk a bit about the girl.
How to Pick Up a Stripper?
There is no single answer to this question, but you can basically break your options down into two categories.
- Be direct, up-front, and honest
- Take your time, chill out, get to know her, and let her basically come to you
Ok, these are both different extremes, and if you want to be successful you are going to have to employ a method that blends both of them together. You need to be direct at the right time, but also patient and cool at the right times.
Remember that different girls are also at different places in life. Some of the girls at the club are literally there to work and then party. For these girls, casual sex and hookups might be a nightly routine. They may not be offended in the slightest if you hit on them and inquire about a rendezvous after the club shuts down… at least, that’s if you manage to catch their eye and do it in a way that is attractive and non-creepy.
At the same time, there are also a lot of strippers who are single moms and/or professionals working their way through college. These girls might be looking for a family man… not a one-night-stand. So try to get to know the girl well enough to know what she is looking for. But then again, some single moms love to hook up. And on the other side, some single girls who love to party are also looking for a steady boyfriend.
Then again, everyone wants to have fun sometimes… so being aware of what kind of mood she is in can make or break your chances.
Plus, plans sometimes just go out the window of the sparks are strong enough!
An Example of How You Might Go About It
To give you a more literal example, here is some pretty solid advice that will at least get you started.
Go to your favorite clubs until you find one where you really like the vibe and the girls. Then, become a regular… but don’t be that desperate, clingy guy who buys all the dances and gets creepy with the girls. Instead, drink and hang out. Talk to the girls. Ask them about their day. Learn their names and listen to them. Become that client who is also a good friend.
Eventually, you will probably pick up on which girls you have mutual chemistry with… and if you don’t rush it, these sparks can turn into real possibilities. Look for signs that she is into you, like subtle body movements that bring her closer to touching you. Does she seek you out and act happy when you are around? Does she vent to you about her day? Does she smile at you and tend to spend a bit of extra time around you whenever she gets the chance?
It can be difficult to figure out if this is an act or if it is genuine. Unfortunately, only experience will be able to tell you that for sure.
If it ends up looking genuine, then it might be time to be brave and close the deal. Ask her for her number, or ask her if she would like to go to dinner. Make sure to make it obvious what you are asking for, though… and do not think that ‘dinner’ means sex. If you want to have her over for a one-night-stand, be bold and tell her so. If you ask her to dinner and she agrees to dinner, don’t be disappointed if that is all that happens.
A lot of guys get scared to make their intentions known, and they end up feeling ‘friend-zoned’ when she leaves it open and doesn’t give a concrete yes or no.
So be bold, and let her know that you are interested in something more… and see how she responds. If she is not into it… then that’s ok. Keep being her friend. She might even introduce you to some of her friends at some point!
But if she IS into it? Well, your dedication and patience might very well pay off. Just don’t get clingy and super-attached if she does pay some extra attention to you! Remember, you have to maintain the idea that you are hard-to-get, and that you know what you want and are not afraid to go for it. But she also has to know that you are not afraid to move on if she does not reciprocate your feelings. There is nothing worse than a guy who won’t take ‘no’ for an answer!
The best advice you could ever employ for how to pick up a stripper is this: practice makes perfect. It might seem weird to say it, but it’s true. Just try. If you mess it up, you will learn lessons that you can use next time. Reading women is no different from any other skill. You just have to pay attention and take risks. Eventually, if you stick with it, you will find yourself having an awesome, sexy adventure with a beautiful exotic dancer, and you will feel like the luckiest man alive.
Just remember to be kind, and remember that strippers are people too. They have feelings, wants, needs, desires, dreams, and goals, and they want to be treated with basic common courtesy and decency. If you keep this in mind, you will go a lot further and minimize the risk of making big mistakes.
Joshua Sigafus is an experienced writer trying to make the world a better place. You can reach out to him on Facebook.